OK. I have two rather large problems in our household right now. The first being LAUNDRY. No one comes in and does it for me! I know, life is hard. In all seriousness, I would like to know if any of you smart ladies out there have a great laundry system. Do you organize it in a certain way? Do you have a schedule that keeps it all in line? The problem is getting so big it is blocking my access through the laundry room. I mean what if there's a fire!!!!!!!!
OK. Number 2. HITTING. I've never had a hitter before. Anything that irritates him makes him want to slap anyone and anything. If you haven't been reading my blog before you need to know that this "little one" is 16 months old and weighs 34 lbs. He can pack a punch. No amount of saying NO has any effect. He actually smiles and laughs. Let me tell you this, that really makes me MAD. I have also taken him out of the situation, sat him on his bottom and walked away. This makes him howl....and hit. Any ideas?
11 comments:
My husband does our laundry :) He he he- am I not the most Blessed!! He usually does at least 1-2 loads right away in the morning, switch it at lunch, done by afternoon to fold. That is our routine, but hey, whatever works.
As far as hitting, yep we have had those smiling hitters too. We do use time outs. If they hit while in time out....they start the time out over. We also take their hand and touch - "nicely" practice after they have hit. Saying we don't hit- we touch nicely.
Our time out area is on our fireplace- right in the middle of our house....so no separation from our kiddos. That way we know if they are sitting down and behaving or if we need to sit him back down again. Etc.
make sure to always do eye contact when speaking to him. Bonding should not be compromised during discipline. After it is done always hug & practice nice touching afterwards again reinforcing the good behavior. ***Note if he hits again afterwards...sit him back down....get your grumpy face on....say no... & repeat.
Takes a while to break this bad habit- did for us..... Hopefully won't be as long for you!
Sorry, can't help you with the laundry...I'm up to my knees in it...and we're only a family of three! Sheesh. I also have a hitter and what we do is we take his face in our hands (gently of course), so that he is looking right into our eyes and we say, "No hitting. Hitting hurts." We ignore the laughting as I think at this age it is a game and developmentally some kids just laugh. Our son is 15 months old so he smiles and laughs when we say no. But it hits home for him when we put whatever toys he was playing with away or move him to the corner. I'm hoping that this in combination with the "no" he will eventually get it. We haven't done time out yet as we will be using the "1-2-3 Magic" method of discipline and that program begins at 18 monhts. Good luck!
I haven't had a hitter - no help there. I think at this age though, whatever you do, you just have to ignore the laughing no matter how mad it makes you.
I'm a laundry "freak". I have to do it ALL in one day! Monday. We're usually home anyway. I throw the first load in before I start breakfast and stay on top of it every 45 minutes until it's done. This is only clothes. While I realize this doesn't work for everyone, it's the only thing that works for me and I don't have to think about it the rest of the week. I do sheets/towels during the week, but not clothes. And really, for our family of 4, I usually only do 4 loads on Monday. My "freakish" nature can also NOT STAND dirty clothes in the laundry room. Steve has mistakenly put clothes there from time to time and it drives me CRAZY. Then you're tripping over them and what not. I think dirty clothes stay in the bottom of the closet in the laundry basket until I come get them. Told you I was a freak.
I do know people who like the one load a day. Or one persons clothes a day. Hope you find some help!
I'm not at all more talented than you!! But, when I'm on top of it, I do one or two loads of laundry per day. I put a load in first thing in the morning, change it over at lunch (or our first school break) then fold it in the afternoon or evening.
All my kids hit. We spanked them and talked to them for a very long time trying to help them see how they have sinned but also how they are forgiven. We also role played through frustrating circumstances trying to give them some other options. Amy was the only one who hit and bit repeatedly. Don't give up! Consistency does pay off in the end! I found "Shepherding a Child's Heart" a very helpful book.
I meant to say that all my kids hit when they were little! They don't hit anymore.
We've been battling the bite/hit/kick/pinch thing since day one (17 months old- 7 months ago) and the laughing and smiling when disciplined. Oy! Very frustrating! Nothing makes a mama boil like watching one kid pummelling the other and laughing about it.
But in better news, any chance you guys want to come up for the Ethiopian family potluck this Sunday afternoon? We'd love to see you! And you can connect with some other AGCI families that live in your area.
I can't believe we were on the same wave length!! I didn't see this post until after mine!! WOW!! great minds think alike!! :)
As far as the hitting, what happens if you scoop him up into a Pack & Play and then give LOADS AND LOADS and OVER THE TOP attention to the victim with zero attention to the culprit. This is what we did with daniel and it worked!! took about 10 times before he realized Reagan got showered with lovies while he watched with envy.
Friday, always laundry day, i'd go crazy doing it daily. take the 6 baskets (each person has their own) and seperate it into whites, darks and everything else, 3 BIG piles. if i start around 8am i can finish by the afternoon, just folding when i have time. it does help that Ama and Shayley (and Mo) can put their own laundry away. Hitting... not good but totally normal and we spank too. Haven't had any more problems hitting, aahh the great wonders pain can teach us in our lives.
I hear you on the laundry thing-IT NEVER ENDS!!! The only thing that works for us is in the evenings my hubby and I fold laundry while we watch tv.
As for hitting, find what you think it the most "painful" punishment and be consistent. He will out grow it. Hang in there-you are an awesome mom!
Looking good that family of yours. Sunita is starting to hit too! GAH! That is just so frustrating. Let me know if you find any gems - we use time outs and talk about "hitting GENTLY". I did spank her once and that just made the hitting worse. Glad to see you are back in the PNW. Would love to meet someday... maybe rendezvous with shawn and gypsy?
Hi Jana
We have hitters or biters or pinchers at one time or another here.
I think eye contact with them is key and speaking the truth in love to them. ...meaning:...(eye contact) (in a very firm voice)..."that (insert the offense) is not nice, that hurts (insert the name), Mama and Papa don't want you to do that anymore. Then plunk them down in a space away from the *incident* A few times of this...and they should get it. If this doesn't work then we'd move to spanking them. Of course this may or may not work in your situation?
Have a wonderful celebration of Thanksgiving...God is so good to us, isn't He?!
Kimmie
mama to 7
one homemade and 6 adopted
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